The Wall
by laurayette4445
Summary: "It was true I wasn't the same Eric, but when I was with her, I didn't want to be the old Eric. I just wanted her". Eric's thoughts during Sookie's choice, set during the season 4 finale. NOW FULL STORY! *rated M for lemons*Review!
1. This Modern Love

**A/N: Hi everybody! So a little idea popped into my brain while I was listening to some music, and trying to think up some ideas for my other stories, and my idea was, well that really sucks with what went down with the little "choice" Sookie made during the season finale. I mean come on, Bill did have his chance, and Eric really hasn't yet. So as I was yelling at the TV for her to turn around and give Eric a big smooch right there, part of me also thought about what must have been going through Eric's mind during that moment. From the range of emotions played in his face, I thought it would be a great idea to write a story in his point of view from that moment. This may be a one shot, or a story. That is your guys decision, so review and tell me if you want to keep it a one shot, or for me to continue to play around with it, and see where it goes as a story. OK, enough with me rambling, and time for the story, I hope you guys like it, and remember to review. Love you all :D**

**Disclaimer: I own none of these characters, but I wish I did…. *wink***

"I can't stand this anymore", Sookie got up and stared at Bill and I, "it's like being ripped in half. No matter what I do, somebody I love gets hurt", I stayed quiet, allowing her to vent, but Bill stood up.

"Sookie, I just want for you to be happy", he paused, "and if being with Eric makes you happy", he swallowed, and I waited for what Bill had to say, "Then you have my blessing", I looked over to Sookie with hopeful eyes. This could be it, we could be happy, no Bill to mess things up. She could love me, and I could love her.

"See", I put my hand on her cheek, feeling the smooth, velvety skin, "its okay, Sookie. Bill's fine with it", hope filled my voice so much, that in any other moment then this I would be disgusted with myself, but right now I was too focused on Sookie to care about any of that. I saw the uncertainty in her eyes, and I knew I had to do something to convince her, "Bill had his chance. He blew it. He, he lied to you".

"To protect me", I was losing her, "and I lied to him to protect you, and you've lied to both of us so many times, we can count", I removed my hand from her cheek and she backed away, "what a mess", she walked over to Bill, and got closer to him, and I could feel my heart slowly start to break. This weakness, how to it get to me so completely. Allowing myself to feel such feelings for her, I should be ashamed of myself. I wanted to turn it all off, to go back to much simpler times, where I didn't give a shit, but I couldn't. I would never be able to go back to that, whether it was because Sookie had such a hold on me, or it was just that fact that I didn't want to be that anymore. I looked back over to Sookie and Bill, and heard the words that made my anger and hurt all the worse. "I forgive you", and then I tried to tune them out, I couldn't listen to her say all her love for him, and him declare it back to her. He has lied, cheated, and almost killed her more than once, yet she always goes back to him. I wanted to yell at her, call her stupid for trusting him, yet I couldn't, because I know if I did that I would lose her. I would rather her be happy, and willing to talk to me, then be pissed off, and never speak to me again. It sounded like such a human thing for me to say, or think, but I just want her to be happy. As long as she is happy, then I am happy as well. I was broken from my train of thought when I heard Sookie start to back away from Bill.

"I know. And that just makes this harder", she looked over to me, and I could see the tears filling up into her eyes. She started to walk over to me, and my eyes widened. My heart sang with content, and happiness, was she really going to pick me? "If I'm really honest, it wasn't just goofy innocent Eric I fell for. As vicious and untrustworthy as you can be", she paused, "there's a goodness in you that breaks my heart, because a part of me has always wanted you", I smiled softly at her and got closer to her. I could make her happy; I could let her live the life she always wanted. I could love her emotionally and physically for as long as she would want me to, and if she would let me, I would turn her, she would only have to ask. Most vampire couples do not make it very long, but we could be different. Our love would be celebrated every day, and people who were loyal to me, and owed me fealty, would also owe the same to her. She would always be mine, and I would always be hers.

"You won't be sorry", I said softly to her, and it was the truth. She started to cry, and I just wanted to kiss them away, and start our life together. I have never felt so human, but when I was with her, I was proud to feel this way, for it proved to me that she was the only one who could make me feel this way. It was true I wasn't the same Eric, but when I was with her, I didn't want to be the old Eric. I just wanted her.

"I already am", I felt like the air had just been punched out of me, as she let some distance come between us, "the time we had together was unforgettable, but it, it's over", she backed away, and I felt my heart fully break. I had to do something, there had to be a way. I couldn't let her end this, end us like this.

"No, wait. It doesn't have to be", all of my thoughts about us, our life together, and our love was slipping through my fingers, and I just couldn't let it go like this. I wasn't going to take this sitting down, I would fight for us.

"There is only one way I see this ending", she cried, and took a breath, "and it's me walking away with neither of you", I tried to get closer to her, and reach out to her.

"Don't do this", I started to feel tears of my own coming up, but I held them down. I wouldn't let her see me cry.

"Sookie", Bill whispered. I almost forgot he was here, and I really wish that wasn't the case. Without him being here, this probably wouldn't have ever happened. Without him ever being involved in her life, we could be happy, but if he wasn't ever in her life, I probably wouldn't have ever met her.

"This is the hardest decision I have ever had to make", she cried harder, and I wanted to comfort her, but I was frozen, "but I know it's the right one for all of us. And so please", she backed away farther from us, "don't try to stop me, either of you"; she walked over to the door and stopped, before opening it, and walking outside. I could hear that she was just on the other side of the door, and I heard her cry. I felt her sadness, and pain through the bond, and it meshed with my own. I finally let someone in, after over a thousand years, and this is what happened. Feelings only make things worse, now I know why I chose not to feel them. For over a thousand years, I spent it fucking and killing, fucking and killing, and then she walks into my bar that one night. At first it started off as just a curiosity, wondering how the fuck she knew about the cops, and then it developed into something more, much more. My feelings for her really started in Dallas, when she stayed with Godric. That proved to me that not only was she brave, and compassionate, but that she cared enough for me and my maker to stay with him in his final moments, when I could not. As I got to know her better, I realized there was so much more to this woman, then I would have ever guessed. She was smart, stubborn, and extremely loyal to the ones she loved, and I respected her all the more. When Russell wanted to kill me, and take her, the last thing I would ever do, if that was my last moment, would to protect her. I had already gotten my revenge on him, and I was fully ready to die, but then Pam came up with her solution to use Sookie. I would never have given her to Russell, but knowing there was a way where I could save her, and end him, I went through with the plan. As I lied there, in the sun, getting ready to die, Sookie still saved me. I knew in that moment, that she had more feelings for me, then she cared to admit. When we kissed for the first time, I felt the passion, and lust, and the bud of new love, that it overwhelmed me at first, but when she ended it, I was more than disappointed. When she disappeared for that year, it was the hardest and longest year I would ever have to go through. I barely slept, or ate, and I didn't have sex for that whole year. Pam was so worried for me, that she almost tried to force me to fuck someone, but I ordered her away, and continued my search for Sookie. It wasn't that I didn't want to have sex with anyone, in fact I was very horny, and I could have fucked someone for a week straight, but I didn't want anyone but Sookie, and I would never admit that to Pam, or anyone for that matter. When I felt our bond spring to life, and I felt her back, safe, and unharmed, I wanted to run to her right away, but the sun prevented me from doing any of that. I felt her sadness, and grief that day as well, and it prevented me from getting any real sleep after that. I knew she was alive, and it sickened me to see everyone that ever claimed to love her, just give up. When I saw her for the first time, after that year, it made all my feelings for her hit me ten times harder than I could ever have imagined. It pained me to know that she did not want to be mine, but I am anything, if not persistent, and I knew how to wait. She would be mine, and I wouldn't let anything come between me and that goal. When the witch cursed me, I have never been so happy in my entire existence. She made me feel like a better man, and to know that she loved me, and still loved me, made me even happier. What I said while I was cursed was the truth, I didn't want my memories back, and I was different. I still am different, and I almost regret getting my memories back. They help me in the vampire world, but it cost me. It cost me Sookie, and for that, I would never truly be happy, until I have her, once again in my arms. I wanted to feel her under me, see the love in her eyes that I saw while I was cursed, and hear her say my name in pleasure, while she climaxed. I would not give up, but for now I had to. I would respect her choice to give her space, and time, but that did not mean I would wait forever. I will have her, and she will be mine. I so desperately wanted to put back up that wall that I have been building up for all these years, but I couldn't. I was different, and so was my wall. I could put it back up, but there would be one tiny flaw, that there was a lock in it, and the only person that had the key would be her. It would always be her.

**A/N: So….. What do you guys think? Leave a review, and tell me your thoughts about it. I welcome all reviews, I know in some areas it may sound a little OOC for Eric, but I truly do think that he has changed in such a drastic way when it comes to Sookie, and his feelings for her. Yet again, I am such a hopeless romantic, tee-hee. So tell me if you guys like it, and I may turn it into a full story, but I don't know, like I said before, it's your choice. Everyone always has a choice :D Peace and True blood to all :D **


	2. Paradise

**A/N: Hey guys, I just wanted to thank you for the great support in this story. It's awesome to know that you guys are interested. So I wanted to clear up that this story and Lying to the Dead are two different stories. They will be going down do very different paths so I hope you all enjoy it. I hope you would all be willing to check out my other stories going on. For those who are fans of What in the World I will be updating it very soon. Also I just updated Lying to the Dead and I hope you would all be willing to stop over there and give it a chance and review for it so I know to continue it. Thanks again guys for all the support. Once again I would also like to give a special thanks to my Beta Gameovaries for all her support and help!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters. **

"What a bitch." I looked over to Bill who nodded.

I looked at the mess that was once Nan and smiled. Fucking bitch just didn't know when to stop.

"Send in the cleaning crew." Bill spoke quickly into the phone. We exchanged glances before the men walked into the room.

Bill took off his jacket and wiped some of the blood off his face. He offered me the napkin and I accepted it quickly.

Red drops fell off my face gathering into a large stain on the napkin, something about the texture and shape caught my eye.

Blood, it was what kept us alive and feeling almost human. The heat that ran through us after drinking someone's blood made us feel normal and connected with the human almost; well, that's how I felt with Sookie anyway.

Her blood as delicious as it was almost made me feel human. When her heart beat mine felt like it had sprung to life as well, no other person had made me feel like this. Sookie wasn't just another face in the crowd; she was more. She wasn't human but she wasn't a monster.

Fairies had history of being extremely cruel, yet when I looked into her eyes I could see no cruelness. She had a light in her that shined as bright as the sun and I meant what I said when I was cursed, I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I snuffed it out.

I shook my head to clear away the thoughts when sudden panic flew through me. It wasn't mine and I realized it was Sookie. She was scared, sad, angry, and fearful. Her sadness was coursing through me the strongest.

"Sookie…" I whispered as Bill and I ran out of the house.

We ran as fast as we could towards Sookie's house and I busted down the door as soon as we reached it.

I looked around the room and saw blood everywhere. The walls were stained with it, with small brain matter pieces laced around the cabinets.

I slowly looked over to Sookie who was clutching her friend's body closely to her. Sookie was soaked in blood causing her clothes to stick very closely to her body. Her face was masked in grief as she cried.

I looked over to the body of her friend and her skin had already become pale. Her face held the blank expression of death.

"Tara, no!" She yelled as she held on tighter.

I made my way over to her while Bill processed the damage. He quickly nodded over at me and went to check the other body in the corner. One whiff told me it was the were bitch and I was glad she was dead.

I lightly grabbed Sookie and tried to separate her from the body of her friend. I tried to listen in for a heart beat but I heard none. Her friend was dead and there was nothing we could do about it.

"She tried to kill me," Sookie cried, "Tara took the shot."

"Sookie, let her go." I whispered. She shook her head and started to hug the body.

I applied a little force and her grip loosened on the body. The blood from her friend started to cover half of Sookie's face and I grabbed a paper towel and wiped some of it away.

Bill approached us and held out his hand for Sookie.

"I am so sorry but she is dead."

Sookie cried even harder and crumpled into herself.

The pain Sookie was experiencing was almost unbearable. Her emotions were everywhere and the sadness she felt was cutting through me like a knife.

I grabbed her and pulled her over to me just trying to comfort her by holding her. I looked over to Bill and he nodded as he took out his phone to call the _cleaning crew,_ as he liked to call them.

"The cleaning crew will come and dispose of Debbie's body properly but as for Tara we will have to set up a plan." Sookie pushed out of my grasp and jumped up and looked angrily over to Bill.

"Don't talk about her like she is some agenda in your big vampire world. She was my best friend and she died for me. Do you know how that feels watching someone you love die right in front of you just because some crazy bitch had a grudge against you? How dare you!" She screamed as tears rolled down her cheek.

Her rage and sadness consumed her as her hands started to glow.

"Sookie." I warned her and she looked over at me.

She screamed and pointed her hands over to the wall, leaving a huge hole where she pointed.

"I can't do this." she turned around and ran away from the room.

I heard the front door open and I felt her run away towards the graveyard. Bill looked over at me and sighed.

"I will call Jason Stackhouse and see if he can help us with this. As of now he is our closes connection to the body and to the police force." Bill muttered as he walked around the room once again.

I wanted to run after Sookie to make sure she was alright and to be there for her, but I needed to wait for Bills say so. I tensed up and looked up at Bill.

"Follow her and make sure she is safe, I will take care of this." he motioned to the room with his hand.

I pounced up and ran towards where I could feel Sookie. I could pin point her exact location because her emotions were too strong to ignore.

The crisp cool air of the night filled my senses as I approached her carefully. She was staring at the night sky in the middle of the graveyard where there was a clear patch of grass surrounding her.

Her clothes were covered in blood masking her beautiful scent with a less pleasurable one. Her body was slouched over as she made no notion that she knew I was there. I walked over to her and sat next to her.

I reached my hand over to her and lightly brushed my finger tips against hers and she moved away from me.

"I'm done." She numbly said as she continued to look ahead.

"What?"

I tried to get closer to her but she kept the distance between us. I wanted to get closer to her and look her in the eyes and tell her everything would be alright, but that would be a lie.

I wasn't sure what the future held but I knew it was full of surprises. Some good and some bad but surprises none the less. Sookie was just seeing the darkness of it yet when it got brighter the whole world seemed just a bit better.

"If I never entered this world she wouldn't be dead." she looked over at me water filling her eyes.

"But _you_ would be. No matter how normal you want to be or think you are, you aren't," I felt her anger start to rise, "I don't know if you remember, but Bill was sent for you so the Queen could use you like her new shiny little toy. If you didn't get as _involved _as you did you would be the Queen's pet!"

She slapped me as hard as she could.

"Fuck you!" she yelled.

"You have."

Her eyes widened and I mentally slapped myself. I kept my exterior cold and emotionless but I knew I just fucked up. I wish I could take it back, but this woman just made me so angry.

Her eyes filled with hurt and regret and I could feel that this is what she truly felt. Her thoughts about me in her mind would be proven correct.

She would feel that I was back to being _asshole_ Eric and she had lost _her_ Eric. I didn't have to be a telepath to know this because it was written all over her face.

"I regret that, I regret all of it. I regret ever falling in love with you, I regret ever meeting you!" she screamed through her sobs.

"Sookie I didn't mean…" She held up her hand.

"No you did mean it, just leave."

"No." I said sternly back to her.

"_Leave!_" her fury and rage ran through her.

Her hands begin to dully glow but I grabbed them before they could fully charge up. She tried to shake herself out of my grip but I kept her wrists locked in my hands.

"Calm down." I demanded through clenched teeth.

I pushed her down to the ground and held her hands at both sides of her body.

"Let me go!" She sobbed and I felt her anger go down being with replaced with just sadness.

She was tired and worn out and the death of her friend was getting to her, slowly demolishing all of her anger. Her emotions were everywhere and I stared at her in her eyes and she visibly relaxed. I felt her sadness, grief, fear, hurt, and a little confusion mixed with lust.

She became quiet and just looked me back in the eyes. Even with her face being stained with tears she still radiated with a glow that made her my Sookie.

The moon shined on her and the only thing I wanted to do was make love to her here and now. Make her forget all of her troubles that worried her and caused her so much pain. I wanted to hold her and kiss her and be the better man for her, but I couldn't.

She wasn't mine, nor did she want to be and that pained me all the more.

With that thought I loosened my grip form her and let her go.

"Thanks…" she mumbled.

She continued to stare at me never letting her gaze fade away from mine. The small noises surrounding us became a dull murmur as everything seemed to slow down around us.

I felt her heart beat and it was the most calming sound in the world to me. Every touch between us would always have an effect on her heart. When I was near her I could hear her heart beat get louder but I never boasted about it. When she slept it would slow down to a steady pace that I loved.

I loved her and there was no going back for me. Was it the same for her?

The night chill became more dominant and I saw Sookie start to shiver. I rolled off of her and got up.

"We should go." I offered my hand to her but she shook her head.

"I don't want to," she looked up at me with pleading eyes, "don't make me go back there, please."

I sighed, it seemed she would always win with those eyes. I took off my jacket and handed it to her.

"At least put this on." She smiled up at me and put it on.

I laid back down and she turned over to me.

"You don't have to stay."

"I want to." I admitted to her as I smiled.

A long silence filled the air as I took in my surroundings and inhaled her scent to remember it. As her scent filled I could still feel a bit of her pain and regret from our fight before.

"I am sorry about before." I said as I turned over and propped myself on my elbow to look at her.

"I know me too," she yawned and laid back down on her back and shut her eyes, "I don't regret it."

She mumbled the last part and I smiled softly as I heard her heart start to slow to a steady pace as she fell quickly asleep.

"Me either." I whispered as I moved a loose strand of hair away from her face.

I let me eyes wander over her face and her body as I took in her beauty. The slight curve of her heart shaped lips made my desire to kiss them almost overwhelmingly strong.

I would never let anyone as beautiful as her ever get hurt again. The world has been so cruel to her and she didn't deserve any of it. If I had my way I would take care of her and she would never have to worry about any of that ever again.

Hopefully one day that could happen and I could wait.

I heard someone start to run over to us and I quickly got up and got into a crouching position with my fangs fully extended. When Bill came into view I relaxed and put my fangs away.

"What?" I whispered, trying not to wake Sookie.

Bill tensed up and in his eyes I saw panic.

"We have a problem."

**A/N: What do you guys think is the problem? How will the funeral play out for Tara? Give me your thoughts and guesses in the reviews. I would love to hear what you guys think will happen! **


	3. Poison

**A/N: Hey guys! So i just wanted to say that I love you all and some of the reviews I got for one of my other stories really warmed my heart and I just wanted to thank you all for the warm words. You guys are the best! So I know this is a bit of a shorter chapter but I have been so busy with other things but I promise to update soon. You all are my inspiration :D Please rememeber to review so I know your thoughts on everything because I love to hear your guesses and your ideas :D I also have a poll on my profile page and if you are a fan of my story "Lying to the Dead" I would really love it if you could go vote on it so I know what you all want. I will post a new poll on my page every week for all of the stories so check back there and vote because your thoughts count in my world :D Now enough with my monologue and on with the show :D**

**Disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters... **

I grabbed Sookie gently and ran towards her house. My thoughts centered on the problem Bill was talking about.

He was back and there wasn't a thing I could do about it. I should have ended but I didn't and now my mistake would cost us. How the fuck did he get out? Who helped him? All important questions remained unanswered and it infuriated me all the more.

It felt like my world was crashing down on me at the prospect of it all. He would find us and he would find her and take her from me like I took Talbot. I cursed myself for my deep desire for revenge. In the end was it really worth it?

I couldn't let any of that happen. I wouldn't let him touch her. I would rather die than see her demise in the cold boney hands of that sinister bastard.

As I arrived at her house I ran up to her room, gently putting her in her bed. I made sure everything was normal in her room before I silently left it.

I inhaled her scent as the air around filled with it as I closed her door. The sweetness of it was euphoric to me. I smelt the sunlight and I remembered her standing in it. Even while I was cursed I realized how beautiful she was in it and it still pained me that I probably would never see her like that again.

When I slowly backed away from the door I realized someone else was in the room across from her. I heard a steady heartbeat and I blurred over to the door and slowly opened it.

I saw Lafayette sleeping there with a sleeping pill bottle on the nightstand and earplugs secured in his ears.

Had he just slept through that whole incident?

I contemplated on waking him up but I realized I should let him sleep. Sookie would have to tell him tomorrow and I knew he would rather she break the news than himself.

I left the room and walked casually down the stairs. My emotionless mask was carefully put on my face hiding any fear or any other weakness from the public eye.

Bill was talking to his guards and I noticed the kitchen was completely clean. The room reeked of bleach but to humans the smell should be gone in a day or so.

"You should have your guards stay the night and watch over Sookie." I stated to him in a bored voice.

I walked over to the wall and leaned against it. I looked around the room again trying to detect any blood but Bill and his men seemed to be fairly competent in this type of work.

"You seem awfully calm for someone with a big old target on your back." He looked smug and confident over his statement.

"Oh Bill, no use crying over spilt milk." I calmly put my hand through my hair and smirked at him.

In all truthfulness I was freaking out on the inside. Russell was twice my age and extremely powerful. If he chose to show himself now I would have no defense and he could kill me if he wished.

But I knew him and he had a taste for the dramatics.

He would wait and strike when least expected. He would hit me where it hurt and right now that was Sookie.

"You have a plan I assume?" Bill asked with one raised eyebrow.

_No. _

"Possibly."

He nodded.

Bill was one moronic king and he was easily fooled. He could be smart but when it mattered most, he let his emotions rein king.

"I will have the guards stay the rest of the night." Bill turned to his guards and signaled them with a hand motion.

"Where are the bodies?" My curiosity was getting the best of me.

I slightly sniffed the air but the trace of dead body had seemed to fully disappear.

"Debbie has been disposed of but as for Tara we are placing her body in a compromising position where it will appear that she has shot herself." Cruel and collective, all hail the mighty King Bill.

We turned to leave until I remembered my cubby.

"I will stay here for the day."

Bills fangs came out.

"You will not!"

I raised my eyebrow, "It's my house."

"Fine, but I want you to report back to me as soon as the sun sets tomorrow night." His face was covered in jealousy and he wished he could stay here as well.

He had such an obsession with being the hero all the time. He wished to look good in Sookie's eyes at all times but with everything that has happened I am surprised that she doesn't see him as the villain.

He let two hillbillies beat her up within an inch of her life and has lied, cheated, and manipulated his way to the top. I would be lying if I said I did not do the same in many incidents, but not with Sookie.

I may have not told her everything but I never lied to her. I would never let anyone hurt her. With Russell I had no intention of ever letting her die. It was all part of a plan to end him and save her.

Her concept of right and wrong seemed to be in a very loose perception of it. It seemed cloudy when it came to all of us and I wish that I had a chance to show her I could be the better man.

I could care for her, shelter her, protect her, and love her.

I broke out of my trance and nodded at Bill. Bill glared at me and quickly left.

The guards stood still some with wary looks on their faces while others glared at me with an arrogance that would quickly lead to their downfall.

"Please. I could kill you all before you had a chance to even look at your guns." I brushed pass them leaving some with looks of fear and nervousness as I walked over to my cubby.

I listened upstairs and heard Sookie talking in her sleep.

"Eric." I heard the faint whisper and I ran upstairs stopping at her door.

I felt like this door was a huge block for me. Inside that room held my deepest desire. I could just ignore her and walk away from this but I knew I couldn't.

"Eric." This time the whisper was more prominent and I opened the door forgetting about the block.

I saw her moving around in her bed in a tussled mess that was her blankets. Her hair was in a messy tangle covering most of her with a frown covering her lips.

I walked slowly over to her and placed my hand lightly on her cheek. Her frown disappeared and a relaxed smile replaced it.

The corners of my mouth tugged into a small smile as I realized that I calmed her down. That it was my name she moaned in her sleep, no one else's.

I wanted to kiss her, fuck her, and just lie next to her. I wanted her and she wanted me, but she would not let herself be with me.

I remembered her and me together. I remembered how happy I was with her and how happy she was with me. I remembered the curves of her body and how she moved when I slowly entered her.

We held a perfect rhythm and she was the most beautiful person I have met. The sex with her was unlike anything I have ever experienced and I have been with a lot of women. Her beauty and strength shined when she moved on top of me.

When she climaxed it was the most beautiful thing I have ever witnessed. She fit me like a glove and it felt like she was made for me and I was made for her.

My pants were becoming tighter and I realized my fangs were out as I broke free from my daydream. She would be mine again and I would make sure we were one once more.

I watched her sleep and I felt myself become calmer and let my worries fade away as I took in her serene face as she slept. He angelic features masking any of my fears for the future.

"Mr. Northman the sun will be rising soon." I looked behind me and saw a small guard nervously staring at me.

I felt the pull of the sun coming closer and closer and I nodded.

"It appears it is." I took one last glance at Sookie and followed the guard out of the room.

I ran down to my cubby and looked behind me at the guards, "Remember boys I'll be watching." I smiled at them flashing my fangs before closing the doors and climbing down the ladder.

I walked over to my bed and stripped my clothing before climbing into the bed.

I looked up to the ceiling and thought of all the things I would have to deal with tomorrow night, but I chose to forget about it for now.

The pull of the sun became harder to resist and my last thoughts before the sun took me were the same as every night.

I remembered Sookie and I.


	4. Again

**A/N: Hey guys! So I am soooo sorry about the late update for this story, I hope you are all out there still reading this story. **_**IMPORTANT NOTE**_**: I have some writers block with this story but if you review and tell me you still want this story I will continue it. Please review so I know to continue it.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters.**

The sounds of footsteps and numerous voices filled my head as I awoke. I looked around at my surroundings and almost forgot I had stayed the day in my cubby at Sookie's. The memory of the night filled my head and I couldn't help but smile. The way she whispered my name in her sleep made me crave her even more but I would wait.

Patience is what will bring Sookie to me. Patience will bring me back my lover.

I quickly grabbed my shirt and exited the cubby swiftly.

"What the fuck Sook where the hell is Tara!" Lafayette's booming voice rang through the house and I made my way over to Sookie quickly.

"Is there a problem?" Lafayette's nervous glances toward me told me I still had the same effect on him as I did when I first met him.

"Where is my cousin?" Lafayette asked more calmly now.

"Lafayette please know I never meant for any of this to happen…" Sookie's voice faded off and I could feel her remorse and sadness course through her.

"Did you fucking touch my cousin?" Lafayette demanded as he made his way closer to me.

He was very brave or very stupid to even think he was a match for me.

"I suggest you calm down and cool your shit before we recreate some good old memories from your first stay at Fangtasia." My fangs were out and I would put him in his place if he even thought of trying something like that again.

"Eric didn't touch Tara." Sookie spoke up and got between the two of us.

"What happened Sook?" Lafayette's voice was broken and I could feel through his emotions that he already knew what happened to Tara.

"She was shot last night saving my life. Someone came to kill me and Tara took the bullet for me." Tears streamed down my beloveds face and I wanted to comfort her but I knew it wasn't time for that.

"Who killed her?" Lafayette started to cry and sat down in the chair.

"This women Debbie Pelt, you never met her." I could see that Sookie was reliving the moment in her head and I wish that I had been there to help her.

"She's dead." Lafayette pounded his fists on the table and got up but Sookie but a hand on his chest and stopped him.

"She's already dead, I… I killed her." The humanity in Sookie was what I loved about her the most.

Even when a were-bitch tries to kill her and kills her best friend she still feels remorse for taking her life. The light that she held inside her shinned even brighter as I found myself falling more in love with her and it showed me she was everything I was not.

She was pure good, full of light, while I held a darkness that not even I understand completely.

I grabbed her hand and tried to show comfort for her in any way possible. Fuck timing, I wanted what I wanted.

She turned to look at me and I saw the trust in her eyes that she use to hold when I was cursed and I smiled softly at her.

She turned back to face Lafayette and let go of my hand to fully embrace him in a hug.

"Oh God." He cried while she held him.

"I know, I know." She soothed while my phone started to vibrate.

I quickly walked out of the room and saw that Bill was calling me.

"What?"

"Is that any way to speak to your king?" _No, it's the way I speak to manipulative cowards._

"Your majesty, what can I do for you?" My mocking tone matched his and I could already feel his anger through the phone.

"Tara's body has been found in the Merlottes parking lot, I figured since so many murders have already happened there what's one more to add to the list." His voice was nonchalant and I honestly didn't see what Sookie saw in him.

She saw his lie, she saw the mask that he wore and the façade of a life he led. It made me sick but I knew she would see it one day.

"Have the police been called?" I asked.

"Yes, they are there now. It has been ruled as a suicide since her finger prints are there and a bottle of vodka was placed next to her. A note was also found but the shifter suggests that fowl play has been used."

"Tell him what really happened. He isn't our enemy." This conversation was becoming tedious and I wanted to rejoin Sookie in the other room.

"I am too busy with the Russell problem to continue to deal with that petty issue. Send Pam or have Sookie call him."

"She is overthrown with grief right now. I don't think she really wants to call anyone, plus if you didn't realize I am also to busy with this Russell shit." I was not his lap dog and neither was Pamela or Sookie.

"Figure it out but take care of it because Sam is causing too much of a scene at the bar." He hung up and I sighed.

I looked through my phone and found the shifters number and called it quickly.

"Hello?" The shifters voice answered quickly and I could hear confusion in it and grief.

"Shifter, its Northman. You are right; Tara's death was no accident she was murdered. She was shot and killed by a werewolf by the name of Debbie Pelt. She went after Sookie last night and the human saved her life, but this must remain a secret. We can't have anyone snooping around in this or in any of Sookie's business. As her friend I would suspect that you would help her in this situation and keep your mouth shut. This remains between you and Sookie."

Silence filled the phone until I heard some movement coming from the other end.

"Where is Sookie?" His shock filled voice asked.

"She is safe but is very shocked. She and Lafayette are talking now and I will tell her to call you once she is ready, but for now Tara's death must remain under the façade of a suicide. The truth must not come out to protect Sookie and I would suppose it will also hide the truth about your dog community as well."

"I'll keep quiet, but I want to speak to Sookie."

"I told you I will have her call you when she is ready. This conversation is done, just keep your mouth shut." I ended the call and walked back into the kitchen.

"I have to get out of here. I just got a text from Arlene that they found her body as Merlottes." He got up and turned to Sookie. "I'll be back." Sookie smiled softly at him as he left.

"Do you want to talk about it?" I asked as she sat down.

"No, not really. I want to pretend it never happened." The tears that escaped from her eyes slowly traveled down her face and I went to kneel in front of her.

"I am so sorry I wasn't there." I took her face in between my hands and made her look at me. "I won't let that ever happen to you again." She leaned into my hands.

"You can't promise that." Her voice sounded defeated and I had to do something.

"I can." She looked me in the eyes and I could see that she was thinking of something important.

"What happened to us?"

"You chose to try and lead a normal life." She laughed.

"Well so much for that." She became serious again. "I regret it."

"Regret what?"

"Not choosing you." My body felt like it was on fire and if I still had a heartbeat it would be going crazy right now.

Was she really saying this or was this just a moment over run with emotions. Was her grief getting to her or was she really thinking about choosing me.

"I want to be normal but I won't ever be. I'm not human and I need to stop pretending that I am. I need to stop ignoring the feelings I feel and the thoughts that scream in the back of my head." She became silent and I waited for her to continue.

"What are the feelings you feel and the thoughts that run in your mind?" I asked and she stood up.

"That I love you and that no matter how much I think that it may be wrong sometimes it feels so right. What I had with Bill was great but I feel in some way it was just leading me to you and that scares me. It scares me to know that I may be hurt again but my common sense is being overruled by my heart." She paced around the room as she made her speech and I just smiled at her as she ranted on and on.

I stopped her and brought her body closer to mine.

"I can't promise that things won't come after us and that people will try to get in the way and stop us from being together, but I can promise that I love you and I won't hurt you. I know that before you saw me as the monster, but I've changed and that scares me." If I wanted her I had to be honest and I knew it.

"You were never a monster, an asshole yes, but a monster no." She laughed as she put her hand on my cheek.

"I always thought Bill was perfect but as our relationship went on he just turned into something that I'm not sure was something the world around us created or was really him the whole time." I am going to go with the latter.

"I'm not Bill." I told her defiantly.

"I know and that's why I love you. You are honest with who you are but I need to know that the person you were when you were cursed is still there. The person uncorrupted by the grief and horrors the world showed you in your life." She searched my face for her answer and I nodded.

"Sookie you must understand that I am that person and always have been but I have to be tough to survive. The world has shown me many horrors in my existence but it has also taught me to be strong. I swear to you that when you and I are alone I will show you that I have always been that person but I have to be the other me in front of others not just to protect myself but to protect you and Pamela. You have my heart and you know who I am, just tell me that's enough?" We stood still and silent as the tension filled the air.

"I can't be hurt again." She whispered.

"And you won't be if you just let yourself be happy." She looked down and I knew the only way for her to understand was to show her.

I lifted up her face and kissed her softly. The kiss was slow and sensual and I put my love through the kiss as I slowly released her. She stood there with her eyes closed and opened them slowly as I backed away.

"Don't make me regret this." She stated before she ran up to me and pulled me in to a passionate kiss.

Her passion and lust filled her as she poured it into her kiss. It felt like life itself as she brought her body closer to mine and I lifted her up and ran her upstairs to her room.

I placed her down on the bed as I ran kissed down her neck and ripping her shirt off of her body. _Fuck these clothes I needed her now. _

I looked down at her body and my fangs ran out instantly. I wanted to feel myself inside of her and I wanted to make her scream my name all night long until the sun took me.

"Do we have time?" She asked as she shivered in pleasure as I placed kisses along her collar bone and removed her bra.

"We have all the time we want." She giggled and squealed in delight as I jumped on the side of her and brought her body on top of mine.

She took off my shirt and placed kisses down my neck and placed one passionate kiss against my lips as she removed my pants that made me growl with lust.

I changed positions with her and took off her small shorts she had on. I saw that she didn't have on any underwear and I smirked with delight.

"What do you want me to do to you, my lover?" I asked her as I placed kisses on her inner thighs.

"I want you now." She told me and I could feel her lust take over.

"Patience my lover." I smiled.

I brought my fingers and began to rub her special spot and I brought my mouth to her lips as she sighed with pleasure.

I rubbed her clit a little bit harder with more rhythm and I could feel herself starting to peak but stopped before she could.

"Not yet." She whimpered as I turned her around and let my hands roam her body.

I turned her back around to face me and I got her ready for myself to enter her. She shut her eyes but I would not have any of that.

"Look at me; I want to see it in your eyes as I make you cry in pleasure." I entered her and she gasped with lust and I moved with rhythm touching her everywhere as I could feel myself start to feel my own personal bliss.

I gently squeezed her boobs and let my hands roam her body feeling her as we both started to peak.

"Oh Eric, harder, harder." She demanded and who was I to leave my lover in need.

I thruster harder and harder and she started to chant my name as I got deeper inside of her.

She clung to me and as I came inside of her and she screamed my name as she climaxed.

I fell to her side and she put her head on my chest and her breathing was string to slow down.

"That was…"

"Great." I finished her thought.

"More than great." She laughed and got closer to me.

"Well I am happy I could be of service to you." I smirked at her as her smile slowly faded.

"Shit, I forgot about everything that happened last night."

"Then let yourself forget about it and relax. You can worry about it later but as of right now just let yourself be free of it." She smiled.

"Your right." She kissed me and I heard my phone start to ring.

"Dammit." I growled as I reached down and found my phone.

"Northman."

"That was quite a little show you just put on. I really enjoyed the way she cried out your name when just a short time ago it was Compton's name she was crying out." My eyes widened in shock as I got up and looked out the window.

"Eric what's going on?" Sookie asked but I ignored her as I continued to search for Russell.

"Where are you?" I demanded.

"Around." He laughed and I growled.

"Show yourself you fucking coward!" I yelled into the phone.

"Not yet, the timing isn't right. How about I let you get back to your little piece of fairy ass while I sample some of the talent in this town. You know that little nap you offered me was very refreshing and I had some time to think. Let's just say that I'll see you real soon." And with that the line went dead.

"Fuck!" I yelled and Sookie flinched.

"Eric what the hell is going on?" She asked.

"He's back."

"Who's back?"

"Russell."

**A/N: Please review so I know to continue the story. Thanks!**


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